IV. Being the Conversation

This is the fourth part of the series on making connections and being part of the conversation.  Not everyone achieves this level, or when they do, wants to, but when you have become the conversation, it means, inherently, that now everyone has an opinion about what you’re doing.

 

Lessons Learned:

 

If you’re at this stage, having progressed through numerous experiences and pitfalls, it means you have achieved recognition.  The first thing to understand is that no amount of recognition will keep you sane or happy unless you can find a balance between everyone wanting you for what they think you are and not what you truly are.

Maintaining that sense of self, especially in your private moments, is essential, since when you “are the conversation” no one can fully help you. However, with “great power comes great responsibility” and your ideas, your work ethic, and your personality all have contributed to your success.

At this point, you may find it useful to understand whether you are the “Peer, Social, or Leverage” type of individual since your personal life is now much more public, people pay more attention to you than ever before, and they all seem to want something from you.

This is where being perceptive can give you clear and key value.  You have choices to make to maintain your position, and they might often be misunderstood or even ugly in some cases.  This all relates to those who seek to take advantage, and those who see themselves as “movie stars” when they don’t really have a sense of themselves.

The other “pitfall” of being in this situation is that you will feel that more people are likely to want to bring you down and keep you up.  This is where your clearest choices must be made.

Think of the movie stars who have avoid drama.  Tom Hanks vs. Tom Cruise.  Lindsey Lohan vs. Sally Fields.  Kanye West vs. Bono.

If you are always looking up, then those “below” have less value to you.  And you’ve become convinced that because of what you made what you were born with, what you know, who you know makes you more valuable than others.  You also likely have the ability to spot more people who were “you” when you were starting out and help them along their own way.

The most powerful thing one can do when you are the conversation is to bring others into it, and explain to them how it all works.  Get them to see the struggle and the challenges, and learn from mistakes like you have, and you end up with success that is unparalleled because you have gone from fame and fortune to longevity.  You can sustain your “legacy” because inherently people will learn from what you did, how you did it, and who you helped along the way.  For specifics on what to possibly do/how to act, figure out whether you are the “Peer, Leverage, or Social.”
To others, your story will often seem more incredible or amazing than it does to you, because you are always in the thick of it.  It’s good to remember this when you are facing numerous challenges, because those best suited to help you are often in need of friendship and guidance to do so.

David Homan
david@homanmusic.com

David Homan is a composer and musician, the executive of a nonprofit organization, and specialist in connecting who has built a network of thousands of peers and colleagues internationally. He regularly sits with start-up founders, philanthropists, and business leaders for informal conversations to keep them motivated and to find the strongest and simplest solution to the challenges they face. He has raised millions of dollars through multiple campaigns, put on sold-out events for thousands of people, advised conferences, staffed panels, and still manages to leave work on time--most days.